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He’s home!

22 Feb

Finally my husband is home from Afghanistan!

I haven’t had much time to blog so I’m just going to make this short and sweet.

Royal and I surprised Scott at the airport in Florida. The original plan was that we would wait for Scott to fly into Colorado then we would all drive back to Florida, but I couldn’t stand the thought of him coming home to an empty house and it was torture knowing he was in the US but we weren’t able to see him! The “so close but still so far away” thing was too much to stand!! I booked a round trip ticket and just guessed a date that Scott might be home. Amazingly we only beat him into Florida by 6 hours! What are the chances that I would book on the exact right day?! Such a God thing!

Scott was in complete shock and couldn’t even figure out how we got there! haha. Jet lag at it’s finest!

 

It was worth all the effort to see the look on his face and to have the whole week, before coming back to Colorado, to adjust and soak in our family time.

Thank you to everyone who kept us in your thoughts and prayers during this deployment! Scott is safely home and we’re so thankful to be able to return to our daily lives for a little while!

Praise God!!

Transition.

23 Oct

I can’t even begin to express how strange these last few months have felt. We went from almost getting used to being new parents, and having our system down, to Scott leaving for his deployment and adjusting to doing it all on my own. AHHH! It’s almost too much change at once. I say almost but it absolutely is TOO MUCH!

I miss Scott so horribly much but I know the pain of having him gone. I know what to expect being away from him. What is breaking me now is the realization that Royal is missing out on having his daddy, and Scott is missing out on time with his son. Anytime we get to Skype, Scott gets sad seeing all the changes Royal is making and it’s only been a month. This is going to be much more difficult than we could have ever expected or prepared for.

The morning Scott left for the airport he just sat on the bed with Royal resting on his legs crying while Royal smiled at him trying to cheer him up. That is one heartbreaking scene that I will probably never forget as long as I live. The relationship they share is so precious and I hate that they’re missing out on time together.

Royal has had difficulty eating lately and it started right after Scott left. He misses Scott even though his little baby self doesn’t really understand the emotions he’s experiencing. When I put Scott on speaker-phone Royal turns towards his voice, it’s so sweet but also so sad. I wish we could jump on a flight and go visit for a weekend. Eh, maybe instead Scott could come here. (Haha.)

With most things time softens the blow, but I know with this it’s just going to get worse until Scott is home with us again. I’m extremely thankful to be home in Colorado during the holiday months, and to be surrounded by family and friends who keep us busy and help keep my mind off things. My prayer is that these 4 months fly by and that God continues to protect our hero while he’s away.

“May the Lord watch between you and me when we are absent one from another.” -Genesis 31:49b

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Boy.

27 Feb

This month we had one of the most exciting appointments in pregnancy: the gender reveal ultrasound! I was on pins and needles for the entire week leading up to this day. I couldn’t wait to know what we were having so that I could fully picture the little person joining our family! I was also anxious to start getting all the baby prep done that was on hold because of this missing piece of information, like the nursery and picking out clothes for “Smalls.” I just couldn’t wait!

When Scott and I were praying for baby, as we started wanting to start a family, we prayed that the Lord would give us EXACTLY what we needed! We wanted the gender, personality, and everything else to be the perfect fit for us. We prayed to be given a child that Scott and I could be the very best parents to. We didn’t care what that looked like in God’s eyes because we knew He would only give us the very best! Gender especially, we were very open to whatever! We could see ourselves parenting a boy or a girl and loving them equally.

Since our first ultrasound, and maybe even a bit before  that, I had an intense gut feeling that baby was a boy. I am one who gets my mind set on something and suddenly my heart gets involved and then I am completely sold on one idea and there’s no going back. Baby’s gender was this same way. I would get rather pouty when people told me they thought I was having a girl because I just felt in my heart my first child is a boy! Silly I know because there’s really no way to tell what the heck you’re having until you go to the appointment. Even the “wives tale”  test told me “girl” and I wouldn’t accept it. Boy boy boy boy boy is all I could accept. Stubborn me!

The nights before the ultrasound I hardly slept! I just kept tossing and turning trying to reason with myself what the baby could really be. Needless to say, I pointlessly wasted a lot of Z’s doing this. There are so many feelings going into this appointment, you worry if you’ll actually be excited with the results and you wonder if you’ll really be able to parent one gender or the other. You face a lot of doubt in yourself during the lead up. I finally had to pray for God to calm my heart so that I could just rest in His perfect plan for us and this baby.

Finally the morning of the ultrasound was here! I drank my 16 ounces of water as directed and jumped into the car! My heart was racing as Scott drove us along the way and it sped even more quickly as he pulled into the parking space. The moment had arrived!!

Baby did NOT want to show us what was going on below. “Smalls” was sleeping or something because there was no rolling over or anything to give us a peek! I had to keep turning onto my side and back to my back just to try to get any type of movement. It’s like the baby knew  what we were after and was not going to budge! Shy much? At last Baby started becoming more active, about 20 minutes into the appointment, and gave us what we were looking for. The tech told us “here’s some boy parts” a little less glamorous than “it’s a boy!” but…we’ll take it! I burst into tears, exclaiming “I’m so happy!” My gut had been right and I was getting my little boy. Scott was so excited he said “I got my hunting and fishing buddy!” We were already proud parents to this little guy. I then looked at the tech and told her “I can only hope he is this good at keeping his parts to himself when High School hits!” (Haha.)

We then sent this out to our parents and siblings to reveal the news!:

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Scott then called up Krispy Kreme to order our blue filled donuts for our gender reveal party that evening! Yum!

At our small group we had everyone choose either a pink or blue clothespin as their vote and then at the end we had one of our friends bite into a donut and show the blue contents! “Boy!!!” It was just so much fun to share our joy with everyone! After the party was over I was able to post on Facebook our official reveal and we were so blessed by all the congratulations and well wishes of our friends! We were happy to celebrate with everyone even with the hundreds of miles separating us.

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(Scott thought the blue teeth were a nice finishing touch. Haha.)

When Scott and I were younger we always said we wanted a boy first because then there would always be a big brother to watch out for his younger siblings. God gave us our wish years later in this little miracle! Our baby already means so very much to us and we’re happy to be having a son! We are blessed beyond belief!!

Now comes the hard part…finding a name…

Wish us luck!! xoxo

New kind of Christmas.

15 Dec

It’s so odd trying to get into the Christmas spirit when you’re used to having freezing temperatures and snow covering the ground. It can’t possibly feel the same no matter how much cheer you put up in your home. I think the funniest thing is listening to Christmas music and realizing many around you don’t know what a “White Christmas” feels like or what it’s like to go “dashing through the snow!” How can you fully picture the song if you’ve never even lived through what a true Christmas is supposed to be?!

There are certainly benefits to living a “white SAND Christmas,” it’s nice not having to defrost your windows or needing to warm your car up before driving down the road, but oddly for the weeks leading up to Christmas I kinda miss it. Never thought I’d miss freezing but I do miss being able to bundle up in scarfs and cute winter coats, I haven’t put one on yet this winter.

There is hope for us this Christmas, as my parents gave us plane tickets home for our Christmas present this year! We won’t fully be missing our Colorado Christmas after all! We’re excited to be fully embraced in the cold and cheer for 2 weeks before returning to our warmer weather. This is just what we needed!

Today we are actually taking down our tree and all the decorations because we don’t want to come home to it after the new year. It’s completely strange taking it all down before the holiday has even come, but we had a little Christmas celebration for two on Saturday morning so that we didn’t have to haul presents back and forth on the plane. I’m glad we at least got a little use out of our tree this year and the experience was precious to us. We always treasure the time we get to spend alone together during this season, it always holds so much love and romance for us.

I’m beyond excited to be home and I pray your Christmas is filled with everything and everyone you love as well!!

Merry Christmas!!

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying:
“Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!” -Luke 2:13-14

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Missing something.

21 Oct

Scott and I had an amazing trip home this month that made us want to move back immediately and now we’re kinda sitting in a low place not feeling real content with our current surroundings. We were alright until we were in Colorado and realized that we’re missing out. It’s going to be a very long time (if ever) until we feel as though Fort Walton Beach is home. It won’t ever hold for us the memories of our childhoods or the friends we made along the way, and mostly this place will never be filled with family just a minutes drive away. I hate that.

It’s maybe time to rethink our approach to settling in here. I find myself wondering if I’ve done all I can to make this our home.

I know I’ve put all I can into the house. It’s filled with all the things we’ve collected in our first 2  years of marriage, precious things that make my heart happy to look at, it’s us in every corner. It’s a home we built together even if this isn’t where we want to eventually end up. I’m proud of what we have done with this rental. Of course someday we want a house of our own, but it might not be in the cards while living this military lifestyle. I’m trying to accept that…really, really, really, trying!!

Our relationships here are wonderful! They’re the kind of friends you only hope to meet and I thank God everyday that we all got stationed in the same place. It’s easy to love them. You quickly bond over the fact that we’re all in the same boat and you know without a doubt that you need one another! They’re your family when family is thousands of miles away. You plan holidays together to soften the blow of knowing you won’t see the usual faces around your table. The support net of my friends has kept me going! During the dark months that came this year they carried me and held me close. They cut me slack when I couldn’t be a very good friend because I didn’t even have energy to leave the couch to attend a girl’s day. I’m thankful for the grace they showed me. Now that my health and emotional state is being better resolved I plan on paying them back in full with however much “Alyssa time” they can take. Once I get that in motion I feel as though we may settle in again better.

Church has been a blessing to us but it doesn’t feel like Calvary. We’ve been attending since April and STILL no one knows our names, we’re not used to that. We miss everyone knowing our history and knowing when we’re going through a tough time. I miss having people who want to pray for you and cry with you. If I were to pin point one thing we’re lacking right now…it’s this. We need our fellowship and it’s hard to connect in the few minutes before and after the service. Scott and I can be really shy at times and we’re pretty shy whenever we walk in those doors each week. We shut down and I can’t figure out why. We need to work on this.

Scott and I have come to a realization that from this point on in our lives we will always be missing someone. Right now it’s missing our Colorado friends and family. When/if we move back to Grand Junction we’ll be missing all of the people we’ve met here. I don’t like that. I wish I could just wrap everyone up together and have it all. One can dream right?!

 

 

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